You’re standing at a crossroads where signs point one way for happiness and the other way for truth. Which way do you go? Those are the two horns of the dilemma you’re facing. The third horn, the tertium quid, is where you simply refuse to choose and just stay in the comfort-zone between down and up. Choosing truth may result in happiness, but choosing happiness will not result in truth; don’t choose at all, however, and you can stay where you are and keep what you have and keep doing whatever you’re doing. Even if you cross out truth and write in adulthood or integrated state on the upward-pointing sign, it’s still a scary looking climb with a hellish death-rebirth transition along the way; not the stuff of which spiritual fantasies are made, or to which the spiritual marketplace caters.