The Four Noble Truths, the Noble Eightfold Path, Jesus, when did everything become so goddamn noble? Fuck noble. If it’s true, it’s noble enough. If it’s not true, it should be fixed or flushed. What the hell does noble even mean? Exclusive, elite, out of the reach of the common man. It means some self-important assholes are trying to lord their spiritual bullshit over the rest of us by depicting it as befitting royalty and too good for the rabble. When it comes down to Hoity-Toity vs Hoi Polloi, I’ll go with the unwashed rabble every time — from safely upwind, of course. No reason to be fanatic about it.

Fuck nobility and the gallant white steed it rode in on. Waking up is a muddy, bloody business and it’s challenging enough without some silk-robed, gray-bearded sages and academics lording it over us like a seven-foot basketball player holding the ball just low enough to make the idiot children scream and flail and leap. The smart kid is gonna punch the giant in the nuts and steal the ball, so let’s do that. Let’s punch Buddhism in the balls.